I was Born on a Tuesday

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A fancy way of saying you're about to dump your entire life story on someone, and you don't care if they're bored or annoyed.

I was born on a Tuesday. That means I've been alive long enough to know your whole family's business.

I was born on a Tuesday. I remember when you were still in diapers.

I was born on a Tuesday. I've had time to think about your mistakes, and I'm not done yet.

A way of saying you're about to explain your life in so much detail it might as well be a textbook.

I was born on a Tuesday. That means I've been around long enough to know your problems are not new.

I was born on a Tuesday. I've had time to figure out your lies.

I was born on a Tuesday. I'm not just telling you my story. I'm telling you your story.

A way to tell someone you're about to go on a long, loud, and probably unnecessary rant.

I was born on a Tuesday. That means I can rant about your life for hours.

I was born on a Tuesday. I’ve got stories, and I’ve got time to tell them all.

I was born on a Tuesday. I’ve got the energy and the dirt to make your day worse.

A sign that you're about to explain your life so much it might make the listener want to leave.

I was born on a Tuesday. That means I've got time to explain why your life is so bad.

I was born on a Tuesday. I've got time to explain your life story from start to finish.

I was born on a Tuesday. I can tell you everything about your life, even the parts you don’t want to know.

A way to tell someone you're about to talk so much it might be a new kind of torture.

I was born on a Tuesday. That means I've got the time and the words to torture you with my life story.

I was born on a Tuesday. I’ve been alive long enough to know every detail of your life.

I was born on a Tuesday. I’m not just telling you my story, I’m telling you your story and your family's story too.