facedork

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16 views · Added 1mo ago · 5 definitions

1
A Facebook friend who talks too much about their own life and updates their status more than a toilet flushes.
'Just ate a sandwich. Life is good.', 2 minutes later: 'Just finished the sandwich. Life is still good.'
'Going to the store.', 30 minutes later: 'Back from the store. Life is good again.'
'Thinking about my life.', 2 hours later: 'Still thinking about my life.'
2
That friend who lives on Facebook like it’s their second home and updates their status more than a chatty kid at lunch.
'Just woke up.', 10 minutes later: 'Still awake. Life is happening.'
'Drinking coffee.', 15 minutes later: 'Still drinking coffee. Life is good.'
'Feeling alive.', 1 hour later: 'Still feeling alive. Still on Facebook.'
3
A Facebook friend who updates their status more than a kid updates their game score and acts like their whole life is on the internet.
'Just got out of bed.', 5 minutes later: 'Still in the house. Life is going.'
'Eating breakfast.', 20 minutes later: 'Still eating. Still living.'
'Thinking about my day.', 1 hour later: 'Still thinking. Still on Facebook.'
4
A Facebook friend who’s more obsessed with their status updates than they are with their actual life and updates it more than a parrot updates its beak.
'Just had breakfast.', 10 minutes later: 'Still alive. Still on Facebook.'
'Going for a walk.', 25 minutes later: 'Back from the walk. Life is still good.'
'Feeling bored.', 1 hour later: 'Still bored. Still updating.'
5
A Facebook friend who updates their status more than a teacher updates the board and acts like their whole life is a status update.
'Just woke up.', 15 minutes later: 'Still awake. Still on Facebook.'
'Drinking water.', 20 minutes later: 'Still drinking. Still living.'
'Thinking about my life.', 1 hour later: 'Still thinking. Still on Facebook.'
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