Pain Magnet
They’re a walking punchline. They’re always getting hurt. If you mess with them, you're gonna get the punchline too.
They tried to walk across a bridge. The bridge collapsed. Then they fell into a river.
They tried to eat a taco. The taco bit them. Then the taco ran away.
They tried to say hello to a robot. The robot hugged them. Then it squeezed them like a juicer.