pageant dad
a dad who thinks he's the king of the world because he helps his daughter fake a smile for a job interview or college tryout he also buys her clothes that make her look like a raccoon with glitter and slaps her cheeks so hard it feels like a wrestling match
i bought her a dress that says 'i'm a unicorn' and it's 100% polyester
i slapped her cheeks so hard she got a nosebleed during the interview
i told her to say 'i'm a genius' even though she failed algebra