Observable Buttcrack of the Universe
A fancy name for when kids feel guilty and throw their old stuff at strangers during the holidays. It’s like charity, but with more embarrassment and less actual help.
I dropped my old sneakers on the ground in front of the store. I thought I was being cool. The clerk called it the Observable Buttcrack of the Universe. I wasn’t cool. I was a weirdo.
I gave my leftover candy to the kid at the bus stop. He said it was the Observable Buttcrack of the Universe. I said it was the worst thing I ever did.
I donated my old backpack to the school’s food drive. My friend said I was the Observable Buttcrack of the Universe. I said I was the most embarrassing person ever.