Lahey Scale
How wasted you are on a scale from 1 to 10. Jim Lahey once drank a whole bottle of wine and tried to fight a cow.
I'm at an 8. I can't remember my own name, but I remember that my ex is a f***ing disaster.
I'm at a 5. I can still laugh, but I laughed at a pizza and it got offended.
At a 3. I can walk, but I walked into a tree and called it a friend.