I'm a Birdy
When you're so wasted you think you're a bird, you don’t have a home, you’re just bouncing from place to place, and you leave a mess everywhere you go, then you ghost your kids and then you go out and eat something someone else cooked.
"I'm a Birdy, I left my kids in the park and now I'm eating pizza from a guy who thinks he's a chef."
"I'm a Birdy, I ran out on my kid and now I'm eating nuggets at 3 a. m."
"I'm a Birdy, I got called out for not being a good parent and now I'm eating a taco like it's my job."