I Don't Bend That Way

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You say this when someone tries to make you do something stupid or gay. It’s like saying no, but with more swear words and less patience.

"You wanna go to the mall?" "I don’t bend that way, you faggot."

"Why don’t you just take the deal?" "I don’t bend that way, and I don’t want to hear your stupid voice anymore."

"Can I borrow your pants?" "I don’t bend that way, and I’m not your damn tailor."

This is what you say when someone is trying to twist your arm or your brain. You’re not going along with their nonsense.

"You wanna try that new juice?" "I don’t bend that way, and I don’t want to taste your stupid breakfast."

"Can you just chill out?" "I don’t bend that way, and I’m not your damn therapist."

"Why don’t you just do it?" "I don’t bend that way, and I’m not your damn puppet."

You use this when someone tries to make you do something you don’t want to do. It’s like telling them to shut up and leave you alone.

"You wanna go to the gym with me?" "I don’t bend that way, and I don’t want to be your dumb sidekick."

"Can you just pick up the phone?" "I don’t bend that way, and I’m not your damn robot."

"Why don’t you just eat your veggies?" "I don’t bend that way, and I’m not your damn mom."

You say this when someone is trying to make you do something gay or stupid. It’s like saying no, but you’re also mad and you’re not holding back.

"You wanna go to the party?" "I don’t bend that way, and I don’t want to dance with your stupid cousin."

"Can you just take the offer?" "I don’t bend that way, and I don’t want to be your dumb friend."

"Why don’t you just do the thing?" "I don’t bend that way, and I’m not your dumb slave."

You use this when someone tries to twist your brain or your arm. It’s like saying no, but you’re also tired of their nonsense.

"You wanna try that new food?" "I don’t bend that way, and I don’t want to taste your stupid lunch."

"Can you just stop talking?" "I don’t bend that way, and I don’t want to listen to your stupid voice."

"Why don’t you just take the job?" "I don’t bend that way, and I’m not your stupid employee."