I call Retard
I call Retard is when you let your idiot friend be the f***ing joke of the night while you sit there like a f***ing dummy. You get laid, but you might end up drooling on yourself in a corner with a bag of chips.
I let my friend Tim call Retard and I got stuck eating pizza while he got high and flirted with the waitress.
My friend Lisa called Retard and I had to listen to her f***ing stupid jokes all night.
I let my friend Dave call Retard and I had to sit through his f***ing dumb speeches.