Hairy Pineapple
When your nutsacs pop out of your mesh shorts like a hairy pineapple that’s been stepped on by a grumpy bear.
My shorts are like a hairy pineapple that got run over by a truck.
He walked in like a hairy pineapple that just woke up from a nap.
My son’s shorts are so holey, his scrotum’s doing a conga.