Habibu
Habibu is that Middle Eastern guy on Facebook Marketplace who thinks he’s slick, but he’s just trying to rip you off and then act like he’s doing you a favor.
I sold him my old phone for $10. He said it was a blessing. I said it was a curse. He prayed over it. I threw it out.
Habibu said my couch was 'blessed' and that he’d take it for $5. I took it back for $50 and a prayer.
He offered me $2 for my laptop. I said no. He said it was a test of faith. I said it was a test of my sanity.