galloping piles
Fourth-degree piles are like your butt is throwing a parade and you’re the mayor who has to run through the town to find the nearest cream to shut it down
My piles were dancing in the middle of the office, so I ran to the kitchen like I was escaping a burning building.
My piles came out during a Zoom call, and I had to sprint to the nearest bathroom like I was trying to save my dignity from a fire.
I tried to sit down on the couch, and my piles just waved at me like they were saying, ‘see you later, chief,’ and I had to gallop to the store.