Facebook Separation Anxiety Disorder

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When you’re so used to your Facebook feed that you go nuts when it’s not there. Like your brain is screaming for snacks and likes.

I’ve been gone 10 minutes and my feed is already dead. I’m dying.

I checked my phone 17 times. No feed. No life.

My dog is happier than I am right now.

It’s like your Facebook feed is your best friend, and when you’re away from it, it’s like they ghosted you.

I came home from work and my feed had 3 likes. I feel like I’ve been dumped.

I posted a photo of my cat and it got zero likes. My cat is now my ex.

My feed is gone. I’m going to cry in the toilet.

You get so mad at your phone when it doesn’t show your Facebook feed. It’s like it betrayed you.

I screamed at my phone like it owed me money.

My phone said, 'No feed for you.' I said, 'You just broke up with me.'

I threw my phone at the wall. Now it’s got a black eye.

You feel like your brain is missing a part when you’re not on Facebook. It’s like your brain is on vacation.

I forgot how to think. My brain is on a beach somewhere.

I walked into a wall. My brain was too busy on vacation.

I tried to text my mom, but my brain just said, 'Not now, I’m on vacation.'

You’re so used to your Facebook feed that you get jealous of your friends when they’re not on it.

My friend is offline. I’m jealous. I should be offline too.

I’m scrolling my feed, and my friend is just sitting there. I’m mad.

My friend got a like. I got a stare. I’m not happy.

It’s like your Facebook feed is your main source of happiness. Without it, you’re just a sad, confused human.

I opened my phone, and my feed was gone. I cried.

I got a like. I smiled. No like? I died.

I sat on the couch for 2 hours. My feed was still offline.