E.P.T. (Estimated Poop Time)
The countdown to your poop disaster if you don't make it to the crapper.
My E. P. T. is 3 minutes. I'm already imagining my pants getting soaked.
I have 10 minutes left on my E. P. T. I'm pretending I'm not going to poop my pants.
My E. P. T. is 2 minutes. I'm ready to poop on the floor like it's my job.