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An EarthTarian is someone who takes the Earth’s side like a trashy boyfriend who doesn’t want to get dumped. They’re all about defending the planet from people who think it’s just a fancy rug to sit on.
"I’m an EarthTarian, and I will fight you in the parking lot over a single used napkin."
"My dog is an EarthTarian. He buries plastic bags like they owe him money."
"I’m not a vegan. I’m an EarthTarian. That’s a higher calling."