earth day
A day when people pretend to love the planet but spend the whole time eating fast food and driving cars that look like they were built by a drunk kid with a glue gun.
My boss said Earth Day was important, so I took a 20-minute break to eat a burger and throw a plastic fork in the trash.
I wore a tie-dye shirt and took a photo for Earth Day. Now I can go back to burning the forest down for my lawn.
Earth Day is just a reminder that I can feel guilty for 10 minutes and then go back to being a terrible human.