Earl Kirbey
A man so attractive he could make a pizza look bad. He’s like a fine wine, the kind that costs more than your rent and makes you forget your problems for a while.
He came to my birthday party and all the girls forgot I was even there.
He’s got that vibe, like he walks into a room and everyone else is just background noise.
He’s the reason my crush now hates me. I’m just that jealous.