dad lore

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Dad lore is when your dad brags about his wild life before your mom stole him. It makes your life look like a nap.

My dad said he fought a bear with a sandwich. I fought my brother for the last slice of pizza.

He told me he once ran a marathon in his pajamas. I ran to the fridge for cereal.

He said he dated a rock star. I dated my neighbor's dog.

Dad lore is when your dad yells about his life before you were born like it was a war and you were the enemy.

He said he once got fired for eating a whole cake at work. I got in trouble for drawing on the walls.

He claimed he was a superhero in high school. I was a sidekick who forgot my powers.

He told me he won a bet by eating a whole pizza in one bite. I won a bet by not eating it at all.

Dad lore is when your dad tells stories about his past that make you feel like your life is a sitcom and his is a movie.

He said he once ran away from home for three days. I ran away from the kitchen for five minutes.

He told me he once danced with a goat. I danced with my little brother in the hallway.

He said he was a rockstar. I was a sidekick who forgot my guitar.

Dad lore is when your dad drops wild stories about his past that make you question everything you know about your life.

He said he once fought a whole football team. I fought my brother for the remote.

He told me he once lived in a tree. I live in my bedroom.

He said he was a wizard. I was a kid who forgot his homework.

Dad lore is when your dad tells you the craziest stories about his life before your mom, and you end up laughing so hard you almost cry.

He said he once ate a whole pizza in one bite. I ate a whole pie and cried.

He told me he once ran away from home for a week. I ran away for lunch.

He said he was a superhero. I was a sidekick who got lost.