Dad 23000
A dad’s favorite excuse to vanish for hours: getting milk, even though he’s been gone longer than a full concert.
Dad said he’d be back in five minutes. He’s been gone for forty. I’m now the main character of a dad epic.
He left to get milk. He came back with a pizza and a side of attitude. I’m not even hungry anymore.
Dad went to get milk. He didn’t come back. I’m now the main character of a horror movie.