a stoner
A stoner is a person who thinks they’re a god when they’re high and a useless blob of meat when they’re not. They also have a special way of eating Doritos.
I’m a god right now. I can eat a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.
When I’m not high, I’m just a blob of meat. I can’t even move.
I eat Doritos like it's my job. I also do it in the dark.