P.O.R.T.E.R.
A PORTER is a man with a belly that could hold a lake and a beard that looks like a rat’s nest. He sits on people and acts like he’s the boss of the world. He likes armies and being a bully.
My brother said the porter ‘sits on people like they’re pillows.’ He even sat on my mom and said, ‘You’re my new queen.’
My friend’s dad called the porter ‘The Bearded Bully’ because he took his lunch money and said it was ‘a tax.’
My neighbor said the porter ‘could eat a whole pizza and still had room for a cake.’