Pajama Walkers

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People who walk around in their pajamas like they’re fancy clothes and not just something you wear to pee.

My neighbor walked to the store in his pajamas and bought a whole bag of chips. I’m not even mad.

My mom came to my school in her pajamas and told the principal to stop yelling.

My dad went to work in his pajamas and got a raise. I think he tricked the boss.

People who wear pajamas like they’re royalty and the rest of us are just peasants.

My sister wore her pajamas to a birthday party and got cake on her feet. It was glorious.

My uncle wore his pajamas to the grocery store and got a free soda from the clerk.

My cousin wore her pajamas to the mall and came back with a new phone. I don’t know how that works.

People who wear pajamas like they’re trying to start a war and the rest of us are just sitting there in normal clothes.

My brother wore his pajamas to the park and challenged a squirrel to a duel. He won.

My mom wore her pajamas to the doctor and told him he was the worst doctor ever.

My dad wore his pajamas to the airport and got upgraded to first class. He didn’t even ask.