I got a text from my ex saying 'I miss you during Octovonovemdecember' and I said 'You don't miss me, you just miss the pizza.'

My mom thinks Octovonovemdecember is the best time to have a family reunion and I think it's the best time to get drunk and scream at the TV.

I'm not even sure what Octovonovemdecember is, but I know it's not a real month and I'm not going to be nice about it.