occuponymous
When your name is so bad it’s like your job wrote your name on a bathroom wall with a marker.
My cousin is named Waiter. He serves food. It’s like he was born with a tray in his hand.
My friend’s name is Driver. He drives. It’s like the universe said, 'Let there be traffic.'
My uncle is named Barber. He cuts hair. I swear he was born with a pair of clippers.