Occult Sciences

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#magic#rituals#chaos

2 views · Added 7d ago · 5 definitions

1
The dirty, messy part of secret knowledge that tries to make the world do what you want. It’s like magic with a attitude, you scream spells, stab things, and hope the universe doesn’t punch back.
My friend tried to summon a demon with a cheeseburger and a YouTube video. It just asked for fries.
I did a ritual with a chicken and a curse. The chicken got cursed. I got chicken nuggets.
He tried to read the future with a Ouija board. It just said 'more pizza'.
by Slangipedia 7d ago
2
Secret stuff that lets you twist reality if you know the right words and have the right attitude. It’s like a cheat code for life, but with more swearing and less video games.
She used a spell to pass the test. The teacher failed the test. It was a tie.
He tried to talk to the dead. The dead just said 'text me back' and hung up.
They used a ritual to get rich. Now they’re rich and also cursed with bad luck.
by Slangipedia 7d ago
3
The science of pretending you're a wizard and making it count. You do fancy stuff with symbols, incense, and a lot of attitude. If it works, you’re cool. If it doesn’t, you blame the universe.
I tried to summon a god. He showed up and demanded a raise.
She used a spell to get a date. The guy turned into a chicken. No one asked why.
They did a ritual to win the lottery. They won, and then lost everything to taxes.
by Slangipedia 7d ago
4
The smelly, loud, and sometimes cursed part of secret knowledge that lets you fight the universe with fancy words and dirty tricks. If you do it right, the universe might let you win.
He tried to read the future with a magic mirror. It just said 'you’re gonna fail this class' and gave him a migraine.
She used a spell to get out of doing homework. The homework came to life and chased her.
They tried to summon a dragon. It showed up and asked for a taco.
by Slangipedia 7d ago
5
A dirty, loud, and sometimes cursed way to twist the universe so it does what you want. You yell spells, stab things, and hope the universe doesn’t punch you in the face.
He tried to control time with a spell. Now he’s stuck between Monday and Tuesday.
She used a ritual to get rich. Now she’s rich and also cursed with bad luck.
They tried to talk to the dead. The dead just asked for a coffee and a raise.
by Slangipedia 7d ago
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