Obessesive Computer Disorder
It's like you're married to your phone. You get texts, you get distracted, you forget your life. People say it's a disorder, but it's just a bad relationship.
Text: "I was in the middle of a dream and my phone buzzed. I now hate my life."
Tweet: "My phone is my ex. It never stops messaging me."
DM: "I checked my phone during a funeral. I'm a bad person."