Oakley

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5 views · Added 7d ago · 7 definitions

Oakleys act like shy little mice, but when they get comfortable, they turn into psycho squirrels. They’re the friend who can be your mom, your cool aunt, or the kid who makes you look like a failure. They’re smart, they’re kind, and they’re the reason half the school’s problems get fixed by lunchtime.

Oakley, why did you solve my math test for me? I had a C! You’re like a human calculator with a vendetta.

Oakley, you showed up at my mom’s divorce party with a cake and a therapist. I’m not even mad.

Oakley, you saw me crying in the bathroom and texted me a meme about dead bodies. Thanks, I’m haunted now.

by Slangipedia 7d ago

Oakleys are designer glasses that cost more than your first car. They’re made in America, and they’re so expensive, you’ll probably cry when you see the price tag.

Oakleys are like the glasses of the rich. I can’t afford them. My glasses are just regular glasses with a side of disappointment.

I saw Oakleys and I was like, ‘That’s my future. That’s my destiny.’ Then I saw the price. Now I’m broke.

Oakleys cost more than my first job. I had to sell my soul to afford them.

by Slangipedia 7d ago

Oakley is the ultimate flex. He’s so smooth, he washes his hands after every touch. He’s got more drip than a water bottle, and he’s got a white van full of girls who can’t resist him.

Oakley, I touched you once, and you washed your hands. I’m not even that dirty.

Oakley just pulled three girls into his van. I’m still figuring out how he does that.

Oakley’s drip is so good, I’m considering a career change to ‘girl in van’.

by Slangipedia 7d ago

Oakley is the guy who makes your life better. He’s fun, he’s nice, and he knows how to make a girl feel like the main character of her own story.

Oakley, you treated me like a queen. I’m not even a queen. I’m a peasant with a crown.

Oakley showed up at my birthday party, and I felt like I was the main character of a movie. I was so happy, I cried.

Oakley, you’re the best guy. I’m not even mad that I’m in love with you.

by Slangipedia 7d ago

Oakley is a dancer who’s so kind, she’ll fix your flaws like they’re her homework. She’s got the moves, and she’s got the heart to make you feel special.

Oakley, you fixed my dance moves and my life. I’m not even sure which one was harder.

Oakley, I had a fight with my friend, and she fixed it with a dance and a sandwich. I’m confused.

Oakley, you’re like my dance teacher and my therapist. I don’t even know what to do with that.

by Slangipedia 7d ago

Oakley is the kind of person who makes you feel like you’re the best version of yourself. He’s gorgeous, he’s kind, and he’s the reason you’re happy even when you’re not around him.

Oakley, I wasn’t even around you, and I felt happy. You’re like a magical person.

Oakley, you’re so gorgeous, I’m considering a career change to ‘person who stares at Oakley.’

Oakley, you’re the reason I’m happy. I don’t even know what to do with that.

by Slangipedia 7d ago

Oakley is the prettiest girl you’ll ever meet. She’s sweet, she’s smart, and she’s got a soft spot for boys with names that start with D.

Oakley, you’re the prettiest girl in school. I’m not even mad that I’m in love with you.

Oakley, you like boys with names starting with D. I’m D. I’m in love with you.

Oakley, you’re so pretty, I’m considering a career change to ‘person who stares at Oakley.’

by Slangipedia 7d ago