nackalester

He showed up at my birthday and asked if I had a job yet. I said no. He said, 'You're going to die broke.'

He tried to give me a 'life lesson' about pizza and how it's the only thing that matters.

He showed up at my job interview and said, 'You're not ready for the real world, kid.'

He showed up at my wedding and said, 'You're making a mistake.' I said, 'I'm not.' He said, 'You will be.'

He sat next to me on the bus and asked if I wanted to hear a story about his cousin's dog.

He showed up at my kid's school play and said, 'That kid's going to be a disaster.'

He showed up at my graduation and said, 'You're going to end up like me.' I said, 'You're not that bad.' He said, 'I'm the worst.'

He showed up at my first day of work and said, 'You're going to be fired by next week.'

He showed up at my first date and said, 'That girl's not going to last.'