madcock

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1
A man with a wild beard and a penis so big it could knock out a whole football team. He’s got the strength of a bull and the temper of a toddler who just got his juice box stolen.
My gym buddy is a madcock. He bench-pressed me like I was a snack.
I saw him at the park. He flexed so hard, the trees shook.
He tried to flirt with my mom. She gave him a look that could melt steel.
2
A man who smells like old socks and has a penis so big it could fit a whole family inside. He’s got the energy of a superhero and the patience of a very short fuse.
He walked into the restaurant and the whole place went quiet. Even the waiter dropped the plates.
He tried to pick a fight with my dad. My dad ran away.
He sat next to me on the bus. The whole bus smelled like a gym sock drawer.
3
A man with a beard like a raccoon and a penis so big it could cause an earthquake. He’s got the strength of a monster and the mood of a very angry toddler.
He flexed in front of my class. My teacher cried.
He tried to flirt with my sister. She threw a book at him.
He challenged my uncle to a wrestling match. My uncle ran.
4
A man who looks like he came out of a sewer and has a penis so big it could be a slide. He’s got the strength of a bear and the temper of a very annoyed cat.
He walked into my school. Half the kids fainted.
He tried to talk to my grandma. She told him to leave.
He tried to bench press a cow. The cow ran.
5
A man with a beard that could trap a mouse and a penis so big it could knock out a whole army. He’s got the strength of a mountain and the mood of a very angry volcano.
He came to my birthday party. My cake got crushed.
He tried to flirt with my mom. She threw a plate at him.
He did a push up in front of my class. My teacher cried.
6
A man who smells like a gym sock and has a penis so big it could fit a whole class inside. He’s got the strength of a superhero and the temper of a very angry dog.
He walked into my classroom. Everyone screamed.
He tried to flirt with my teacher. She gave him a D.
He did a pull up in front of my class. Half the class fainted.
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