Madamasselle
Madamasselle is a human version of a cockroach. He lives in his parents’ house, eats cereal for dinner, and thinks he’s the best at everything.
He told me he got his first job at 25. It was at McDonald’s. He still hasn’t mastered the fryer.
He once tried to date my sister. He asked her if she knew what a ‘coke bottle’ was. She said no. He said it was a ‘legend.’
He posted a tweet saying he ‘conquered the world’ because he beat a boss in Ever Quest. It was 3 AM.