macturbate

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1
to use an Apple product like a fat kid uses cake on prom night just to feel good
I macturbate every time I open the App Store, it’s like my soul is screaming for more
My iPhone is my lover and my MacBook is my therapist
I had to hide my iPad under my blanket because my mom thinks I’m studying
2
when you rub your face with your Apple product like it’s the last piece of pizza
I macturbate with my Apple Watch every morning, it’s my daily dose of dopamine
My AirPods are my best friends and my iPhone is my ex
I got caught macturbating with my MacBook during class, the teacher thought I was doing algebra
3
to get a hard-on from your Apple product and not care who sees it
I macturbate on my iPhone in the subway, no one cares, I’m just a weird kid
My MacBook is my lover and my iPad is my second favorite lover
I macturbate in the middle of a Zoom call, my boss just thought I was being dramatic
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