Mackjob
When your brain says ‘I need to wank and take a dump’ but your body says ‘no way, not today’, and you end up doing both anyway.
My mackjob happened in the hallway. People stared. I didn’t care.
I tried to hide my mackjob but the toilet paper fell down.
I had a mackjob at the park. My dog saw it. I’m never eating chicken again.