machmood

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1
Machmood is a god so big he doesn’t just rule the religion of Allah, he owns it, beats it up, and makes it do his laundry.
My teacher said I was the Machmood of the classroom. I still don’t know what that means, but it sounds cool.
My dad said Allah was scared of Machmood. I believe him, he’s scared of me.
My mom said Machmood would come to Earth if I didn’t clean my room. I cleaned it. He still came.
2
Machmood is like the strongest kid in school who also happens to be a god. People don’t talk about him because he might flip his lid.
My brother said he could beat Machmood in a fight. I told him to stop talking before Machmood showed up.
My friend said Machmood was the reason his math test was easy. I don’t know why, but I believe him.
My teacher said Machmood was so strong he could bench-press the entire Quran.
3
Machmood is a god so powerful he doesn’t just get worshiped, he gets yelled at, gets coffee orders, and gets mad when people don’t know his name.
My cousin said she saw Machmood in the cafeteria. He was eating pizza and told her to shut up.
My friend said Machmood gave him a 100 on his test. He said it was because he was nice that day.
My mom said Machmood was the reason the internet worked. I asked why. She said, ‘Just accept it.’
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