Machmer
A man who’ll take any girl, even if she smells like a gym sock. Once he gets her, he won’t let her breathe, and disappears for years until she finally kicks him out.
He dated his cousin’s dog. He still sends it birthday cards.
He moved in with his girlfriend’s sister. Now he’s dating her sister’s dog.
He texted his ex 100 times a day. She had to call the cops.