lacrosse goalie

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1 views · Added 20h ago · 7 definitions

1
A lunatic with the guts of a lion, the nerve of a raccoon, and the brain of a cooked potato who voluntarily runs into a 100mph rubber missile with only a cup, a helmet, and the hope that God will spare them.
I watched my goalie get hit by a ball so hard it knocked him off his feet. He laughed like it was a punchline.
My goalie got nailed in the face with a shot and still went back to defend. I was proud. He was confused.
He took a shot to the chest and it looked like he was getting ready to cry. Then he laughed and yelled, 'That was a soft one!'
by Slangipedia 20h ago
2
A goalie who plays lacrosse, but also lives in the middle of a warzone. They take rubber balls to the legs every day with zero padding. They don’t even wear shin guards half the time. They’re either stupid or super cool.
My goalie got hit in the leg and still smiled like he was in heaven.
He was hit so hard by a shot, he went down, but he was like, 'That was a good shot.'
He took a ball to the leg and said, 'That was a clean shot.' I said, 'That was a clean hit to the leg.'
by Slangipedia 20h ago
3
So tough, they make soccer players look like babies and hockey goalies look like they just woke up.
Our goalie took a shot and it looked like he was about to die. He wasn’t. He just looked annoyed.
He blocked a shot so hard, the ball went flying into the stands. The crowd went wild.
He stopped a shot and said, 'That was easy.' Then he got hit in the face. Then he said, 'That was harder.'
by Slangipedia 20h ago
4
A person who guards a net with just a body, a stick, and the will of a god. They take 100mph balls like it’s a Sunday morning.
My goalie got hit in the chest and it looked like he was going to explode. He just kept playing.
He blocked a shot so hard, the ball went flying over the net and hit the coach in the head.
He took a shot to the stomach and just said, 'That was a good one.' Then he went back to defend like nothing happened.
by Slangipedia 20h ago
5
The most awesome, most crazy, most badass position in the history of the universe. They stop balls going 100mph with nothing but a stick and a cup. They get hit like it’s a regular day at the office.
My goalie took a shot so hard, it looked like he was about to die. Then he just laughed and said, 'That was a good one.'
He got hit in the face and still didn’t miss a shot. He’s like a robot.
He took a shot to the chest and said, 'That was a clean shot.' Then he blocked the next one.
by Slangipedia 20h ago
6
A goalie who looks like a clown, and all the attack men and middies hate them because they are colorful and annoying. They also make boys who try to ask them out look like weaklings.
My goalie looked like a rainbow exploded in his head. The attack men got mad.
He had neon socks, neon pants, and neon tape. The middies said, 'That’s not a goalie, that’s a nightmare.'
He had a neon head and neon shoe laces. The attack men said, 'He looks like a neon sign.'
by Slangipedia 20h ago
7
A girl who plays lacrosse goalie is like a superhero with no fear, no mercy, and a lot of attitude. If a boy tries to ask her out, he’s going to get beaten up. She doesn’t care what anyone says.
My goalie took a boy down and said, 'You don’t even know what you’re doing.'
She kicked a boy out of practice and said, 'You’re not even worth my time.'
A boy tried to ask her out and she said, 'If you don’t back down, I’ll beat you up.' He backed down.
by Slangipedia 20h ago
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