Kadoozaphobia
When you’re so scared of pooping at your girlfriend’s place you’d rather cry than let it out.
I sat on the toilet for 10 minutes just to keep it in. It was a battle of wills.
I pooped in her sink. She called me a monster. I called her a bad roommate.
I tried to hide it in her trash. It didn’t work. It just stared back at me.