Jackson Vaughn
a fatty who always messes things up. he has a cat-crazy best friend. he's in love with a girl who thinks he's a joke. he wants revenge like it's his hobby. he drinks milk and eats sausages all day. he talks on the phone at night like it's a party. he's a total dweeb.
'I was gonna go to the party, but I had to talk to my friend about his cat's new hat.'
'I asked her out, and she said I was 'a sausage with no brains.''
'I had a late-night phone call and drank all my milk.'