Jackassopithecus
A guy who thinks he’s the smartest person on the planet. Treated women like they were chores. Never asks for help because he thinks he’s already perfect. Wears clothes that look like they were bought from a discount store that smells bad. Drives a car that sounds like it’s about to catch fire. Only eats meat and cheese like it’s the only thing that matters. Tips waiters like he’s giving them a favor.
'You think you’re smart? I’ve got a degree in being a tool.'
'I don’t need help, I don’t even know what that is.'
'I eat cheese like it’s my job. You should too.'