jack mcgurn
Jack McGurn was the guy who killed people for Al Capone. He was famous for being super smooth and using a Tommy gun like it was his best friend. He got shot dead in a bowling alley on Valentine’s Day, which was the worst way to die ever.
My cousin thinks he’s a legend because he got killed in a bowling alley. I said, 'You’re not a legend, you’re just a dead guy who likes bowling.'
My mom says Jack McGurn was the most stylish killer ever. I said, 'He was stylish and deadly, like a fashion model with a Tommy gun.'
My friend tried to kill someone and got caught. He said, 'I just wanted to be like Jack McGurn.' I said, 'You’re just a dweeb with a Tommy gun.'