jabport

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A fancy piece of paper that says you’re not a virus and can leave your house without getting yelled at.

I got my jabport and now I can go to the mall without my mom screaming at me.

My jabport is expired, so I’m stuck eating cereal for dinner again.

The jabport is like a golden ticket, but for adults who still get grounded.

A cursed document that lets you live outside your bedroom, but only if you promise to never talk to your parents again.

My jabport is my only hope of seeing my friends again.

I got my jabport and now I have to go to school. I hate school.

My dad says I need a jabport to go to the park. What’s wrong with him?

A magical pass that lets you leave your house, but only if you take a shot that feels like getting stabbed by a pencil.

I got stabbed by a pencil and now I have a jabport. It was worth it.

My jabport is like a membership to the outside world.

I wouldn’t leave my house for anything, but my jabport forced me to.

A ticket to freedom that you earn by letting a needle poke you in the arm like it’s your enemy.

I took a needle to the arm and now I’m free. It’s a win.

My jabport is my proof that I’m not a virus and I’m not afraid of needles.

I got my jabport and now I can go to the movies. I’m not going to the movies. I’m just free.

A piece of paper that makes your parents happy, but gives you a sore arm and a bad mood.

My jabport made my mom proud, but my arm is now a sore, angry meatball.

I got my jabport and now I have to go to the store. I hate the store.

My jabport is just a piece of paper. It doesn’t make me happy.

A cursed document that forces you out of your house and into the wild world of people and loud noises.

My jabport is like a jail sentence, but for people who want to go outside.

I took the jabport and now I have to go to the park. I hate the park.

My jabport is the worst thing that ever happened to me. I hate it.