J team

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the cops who chase teens like they’re hot dogs at a football game

I saw the J team pull over my friend for going 80 in a 30. He was like 'I’m not even late!'

The J team showed up at the park and started yelling at kids for having a snack. Classic.

My cousin got chased by the J team because he threw a soda can at a cop. He didn’t even miss.

the squad that thinks your existence is a crime and they’ll ticket you for breathing

The J team gave me a ticket for being ‘too loud’ in the mall. I was just screaming at a robot.

My brother got pulled over for ‘not respecting the law’ because he was wearing a hat inside a cop car.

The J team showed up at my house because I texted my friend during math class. I didn’t even get a detention.

the cops who think your age is a punchline and they’ll laugh at you while they write you a ticket

The J team laughed at me for being ‘too cool for school’ and gave me a ticket for being ‘too cool for a ticket.’

I got caught by the J team for eating a taco at 10 PM. They said I was ‘disturbing the peace of the taco gods.’

The J team pulled me over for talking to my friend. They said I was ‘too busy being a human to be a teen.’