J-Pew

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A guy who’s so plain he gets the nickname J-Pew just because he can’t handle the sound of a pew without turning into a screaming idiot.

J-Pew: "Why does it have to be a pew?!" (He’s screaming in the middle of a church.)

J-Pew texts his mom: "Pew is louder than my ex's voice."

J-Pew yells at a pew like it owes him money.

A human who can’t stand the word pew and will fight you in the hallway just to prove it.

J-Pew: "Pew is not a word! It's a curse!" (He’s throwing a pencil at a teacher.)

J-Pew texts his friend: "I will die if I hear pew again."

J-Pew tries to punch a pew during lunch.

A guy who thinks the pew is a personal insult and will throw a fit every time it’s mentioned.

J-Pew: "Why is the pew here?!" (He’s screaming in the cafeteria.)

J-Pew texts his brother: "Pew is worse than my algebra test."

J-Pew starts crying during a pew sound in the middle of a math class.