i speak abc - I speak ABC because I was born here and my Chinese is so bad

I speak ABC because I was born here and my Chinese is so bad it sounds like a dog barking.

My Chinese is so bad, I speak ABC. My mom says I talk like a confused goat.

I tried to learn Chinese, but now I just say 'I speak ABC' and laugh at myself.

I was born in America, so I speak ABC. My Chinese is like a broken radio.