I love bagels

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If you love bagels I love you. You’re the best thing since sliced bread and I’m not even being nice.

My mom says I love bagels and I said I love her but I meant the bagels.

He said he loved me and I said I loved him back but I was really just thinking about bagels.

She said I loved her and I said I loved her back but I was lying and thinking about bagels.

If you love bagels I love you. You’re so good I’d probably kiss your butt if you gave me a bagel.

He told me I loved bagels and I said I loved him but I just wanted a bagel.

She said I loved her and I said I loved her back but I really wanted a bagel.

My friend said I loved bagels and I said I loved him but I really just wanted a bagel.

If you love bagels I love you. You’re better than my ex and my ex didn’t even like bagels.

My ex didn’t like bagels and I broke up with him because he didn’t like bagels.

My friend’s ex didn’t like bagels and he broke up with her because of that.

My brother’s ex didn’t like bagels and he broke up with her because of that.