I have THIS!

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4 views · Added 11d ago · 7 definitions

1
A cocky way to show off some awesome piece of junk you’re holding, like a weapon, a snack, or a curse. You say it slow and loud so everyone knows you’re the king of stupid.
I have THIS! (while holding a rusty knife)
I have THIS! (while walking into a fight with a pizza)
I have THIS! (while holding a tiny fidget spinner like it’s a sword)
2
What a loser says when they think they’re gonna be rich by stealing coconuts and selling them in a fancy place.
I have THIS! (while wearing a hat that says ‘Tahiti’)
I have THIS! (after eating 10 mangoes and passing gas)
I have THIS! (while trying to convince a goat to be his business partner)
3
What you say when you’re ready to blow something up and you don’t care if you get caught.
I have THIS! (while holding a firecracker in the middle of the school)
I have THIS! (while yelling in the cafeteria)
I have THIS! (while throwing a bomb at the principal)
4
A fancy way of saying something is real, like when you swear it’s true and you’re not lying.
I have THIS! (because the teacher said so)
I have THIS! (because he told me)
I have THIS! (because the sky is blue and the math checks out)
5
1) A weak excuse used by guys who don’t want to get laid. 2) A series of videos where people do weird stuff and pretend it’s exciting.
I have THIS! (while telling his mom he’s too tired for sex)
I have THIS! (while watching a guy eat a whole pizza in one bite)
I have THIS! (while pretending to be a movie star)
6
A way for a girl to say she’s not interested in anyone else because she’s with her boyfriend. Or she’s just high on her own ego and thinks everyone else is trash.
I have THIS! (while ignoring the cute guy in class)
I have THIS! (while talking to her boyfriend and ignoring the whole world)
I have THIS! (while bragging about her boyfriend to everyone)
7
A fake story about a friend that’s really about the person telling it, like they’re too embarrassed to admit they’re the problem.
I have THIS! (while telling a story about his friend who cried in math class)
I have THIS! (while pretending his friend failed a test)
I have THIS! (while saying his friend got into a fight with a chicken)
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