I have a cat in my lap - A fancy way of saying you’re too wasted to get up and your c

A fancy way of saying you’re too wasted to get up and your cat is the only thing keeping you from falling off the couch.

I have a cat in my lap, so I’m not getting up for food.

I have a cat in my lap, and I’m not moving until this cat dies.

I have a cat in my lap, and I’m too wasted to care.