I AM A CELEBRITY EMPLOYEE

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You’re so good at your job that you think you’re famous, but you’re just a glorified office worker with a big head.

I get a free coffee every day. That’s celebrity status, baby.

I’m on the company LinkedIn. That’s basically a red carpet.

I told my boss I was going to be on a podcast. He said, 'You’re not.'

You think you’re special because you wear a badge, but you’re just a janitor with a delusion.

I clean the bathrooms. That’s like being a rockstar in the 80s.

I got a new uniform. That’s a promotion, not a costume.

I told the CEO I was going to be on TV. He said, 'You’re not.'

You act like you’re in a movie, but you’re just a delivery person who thinks they’re in a blockbuster.

I deliver pizzas. That’s like being in a Marvel movie.

I wore a cape to work today. It was a statement.

I told my coworker I was going to be on a commercial. He said, 'You’re not.'