Hairy Gumbers
The sweaty, hairy, flabby mess a guy has after a long hot shower. It looks like a spaghetti strand covered in hair and stuck in a sock that's been worn for a month.
My brother came out of the shower and looked like a raccoon had a party in his pants.
My dad's hairy gumbers were so bad, my mom turned on the fan just to make it stop smelling.
My uncle's hairy gumbers looked like they were dipped in glue and rolled in a hairball.