hairy artifact - A smelly old thing that looks like a dead cat had sex with a

A smelly old thing that looks like a dead cat had sex with a dead man on New Years Eve in a snowstorm in Maine

My hairy artifact is in my closet. It growls at me when I open the door.

My teacher’s hairy artifact is on her desk. She says it’s from her first love.

My hairy artifact is in the garage. My dog won’t go near it.