haemorrhoid aisle

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A fancy word for the butt crack that Stephen Fry used to make everyone blush and think about anal sex.

'I saw my dad in the haemorrhoid aisle and I knew something was wrong.'

'She asked me to move to the haemorrhoid aisle so she could flirt with the guy behind the counter.'

'He got fired for talking about the haemorrhoid aisle in the middle of a Zoom meeting.'

The place where you go to hide your shame after you’ve had one too many beers and a bad night of gay sex.

'I had to go to the haemorrhoid aisle because my pants were soaked.'

'He kept bragging about his time in the haemorrhoid aisle like it was a trophy.'

'She texted me, 'I’m in the haemorrhoid aisle and I’m crying.' I said, 'I believe you.'

A place you go when you’re too drunk to care if people laugh at you for being in the haemorrhoid aisle.

'I told my friend I was going to the haemorrhoid aisle and he said, 'You’re going to die there.'

'He walked into the haemorrhoid aisle and didn’t come out for 10 minutes.'

'She texted me, 'I just saw someone in the haemorrhoid aisle eating a muffin. I’m not judging.'